They say there’s no greater pain that someone can experience than childbirth. Whoever said this was probably a woman. I’m not saying that pregnancy/childbirth is a picnic, but being the husband of someone you care about being in pain is just as bad. It’s hard watching someone suffer and not being able to do anything about it. All the books really tell the guy to just “deal with it” but I’ve never been that kind of guy. I’m getting used to this whole “pregnancy changes everything” outlook on life. If someone barks at me, I’m gonna show them attitude right back. My wife is going through all these changes and I want her to come out and play. I’m not playing a pity card, I’m just venting that I feel kind of useless when my wife is creating something inside of her (which still boggles my mind).
There’s no doubt I’ll be super proud of my wife when the time comes to have a baby, and I’ll be so in love with the new baby but right now I’m going through a roller coaster of emotions, and this is probably the only way I can get it out. Some advice if you don’t want to feel useless/inconsiderate, follow my three-fold plan. You know, if you’re not “whipped” but want to help.
1. Incessantly ask your wife how she’s feeling, if you can do anything, if you can get her anything, etc.
This shows that you care and you’re willing to be there when she needs you. Pregnant women pretty much act like invalids and usually carrying your baby is an incentive for you to do what she wants. Make your wife as comfortable as possible and just remember she’ll be normal again once the baby’s out.
2. Help out around the house
If your wife did everything for you before short of wiping your butt, it’s time to get that butt into gear. Pretty soon, she’ll be too pregnant to do anything so make sure you take on responsibility by washing dishes, vacuuming, taking out the trash, etc. If you already do these things, then it should be easy.
1. Don’t make jokes or complain.
Complain that your back hurts at least once and you’ll never hear the end of it. Don’t make jokes about her gaining weight, or anything else insensitive. Keep saying that you love her and start discussing stuff about the baby (what it’s gonna look like, you hope it doesn’t get your big nose, what theme you want the nursery to have), making her less nervous and more aware that you’re actually excited about having a baby.
Bottom line is be supportive and happy. You have to remain the positive one because your wife is not going to always be happy through this pregnancy.